Not much to say but compelled to say it

What a long strange couple of days it has been. What an overwhelming couple of days/weeks it has been. Trying to complete the quarter and fine tune Commencement has taken a great deal out of me…physically and spiritually. But there has been much Grace in these past days and weeks.


I finished Fr. Griffiss’ class for him on Thursday. He hasn’t been feeling well and I was given the task of lecturing. It was wonderful, but only through the Grace of God and the kindness of those with me in the classroom.


Some dear friends visited this weekend past and it was so very nice to be with them. It did however make me a bit homesick and I began to long for the ‘good ole days,’ where the Magnolias are in bloom and the air is hot and wet. I shall return one day. But it is comforting to no end to know that you are loved.


I am now the keeper of the Golden Spike award, the award for the most Anglo-Catholic student here at Seabury, surprise, surprise I know. But I also got the most manly man award, I think that is a historical first for the unlikely combination of awards. I was in the back of my mind sort of hoping to receive some sort of academic acknowledgement, but I remind myself why I am here and to Whom I belong. non nobis Domine


I took a break tonight and Cat and I went and saw The Matrix II. I propose the argument the Neo is actually an Anglican priest and most probably a good Anglo-Catholic. James turned me on to the Cassock he wore during the movie, and I swear I counted 39 buttons. We’ll have to wait for the conclusion to be sure. I was also amazed at the incredible understanding of pre-modern theology (of the Eastern variety) I found in evidence…someone, somewhere has a decent understanding of Patristic thought and Johannine Christology…along with a powerful vivid imagination. I’ll wait until others see the movie to dive in further.


Tomorrow the St. Paul’s E.Y.C. from my home parish comes to Chi-town for a week of mission and fun. We leave tomorrow morning to meet and spend time with them. It will be a blessing to see so many familiar faces…but the timing is lacking. They leave Friday, the same day as our Commencement…so if I thought I was spread thin before…I ain’t seen nothing yet. After Friday I am a free man…tied only to C.S. Lewis and blogging friends…and a Seabury lawnmower.


I am also taking Huw’s advice and trying to find a host for my page. Blogger is getting frustrating. I have had trouble posting and can’t read many peoples pages. But that too will have to wait until summer.


Grace and Peace

The Countenance Divine and the end of career

My jaunt into the world of teaching is drawing to a close…a very early retirement from a noble and virtuous calling. I have a newfound appreciation for those who give themselves entirely to the demanding task. I might have one or two more lectures, depending on the health of the professor…which makes me very nervous. I have to be prepared to lecture but at the same time I probably won’t have to actually lead the class. So the final leg of this journey is tedious and pretty much mirrors the rest of my life right now. Prepared for anything, but not really having anything that requires my sole actions…unless it is to fill in or act on another’s behalf.


A few days ago a dear friend asked me to pay him a visit. He has been very ill and for 2 days his life hung in the balance. I thought I was going to give comfort and solace to my friend…but God has many tricks up His sleeve. When I arrived he asked me, “How is your soul?” I thought it an odd question for a man in his state to ask. I replied, O.K. Which he of course saw through immediately. Can our souls ever be O.K. when we are searching for a fuller and true understanding of God? He knows better. Some of us get whacked by the swords of angels and others experience darkness and try and answer questions that are to Holy for words, only to face doubt and fear.
He told me of his being in the presence of God for those two days. While I can’t share our conversation per say, I can tell you it was Grace filled and he described it as a two day Eucharist…living behind the iconostasis and singing hymns…What Wondrous Love is This…Humbly I Adore Thee…Now My Tongue the Mystery Telling…Let All Mortal Flesh. His recount of Grace and the peace of God which passeth all understanding moved me to tears. He pronounced a blessing upon me and then fell asleep. As I left, I hadn’t realized that I too had been in the light of Divine Countenance.
I have sinned in the fact of not recognizing this…Upon leaving the hospital I became caught up in trivial matters and the Grace that permeated into my very soul was shrouded by selfish decay. I have atoned for that, and give thanks to God that salvation is not a one shot experience but rather a life lived into the fullness of God in Christ Jesus.
I give thanks for the Saints and Angels that watch over and pray for us as well. As James has duly noted, we need a good whacking from time to time.


Grace and Peace

The Church Militant Upon the Earth

I survived my first lecture. It went better than I had hoped, which was very nice during this chaotic time. I did unknowingly prepare about six hours of lecture for a two hour class…which is O.K. there won’t be much planning for Thursday. I’m also trying to sure up a sermon I have to preach tomorrow on the Visitation- it proven more difficult than I had thought, but that to will pass.


Father Knight jokingly made the remark about “THE ritual movement”. And after today’s class and much research I say, yes, THE Movement. When the Episcopal Church lost its identity with England, it was in ruin and really had no identity-not much different with any of the denominations in the “new world.” One sect of the Church sought to keep its ties with as the “National Church” and exemplify the evangelical zeal of the other protestant denominations that were growing. The other sect sought its identity first in the Book of Common Prayer and in the Apostolic Tradition, but then sought out a truer identity…a search for an identity that lead them to the historical councils and creeds and Tradition- hence the Catholic Movement or the Ritualistic movement. Which is one reason we have historically had good ties with the Roman and Eastern churches…that particular sect drew much from the foundations of the two. With our modern day emphasis on the Eucharist, the sacraments, and the Episcopate…I argue that the Episcopal Church would not have survived its break with Mother England if not for its claiming of the historical foundations of the sacramental life. It is fascinating for me to think about just how isolated America was/is from the rest of Christendom…how we have had to make our way through the mire. I think of how disconnected some Roman Catholics feel in this country- its almost a different Catholicism. If any Roman Catholics read this, please know I meant not to be offensive, justing thinking about the different worlds. I think about the Orthodox Church in Alaska, that at one point in time divided up the land with the Anglican Church for reasons of distance and pastoral obligations- they too had to work things out a world away as well. I am in awe of just how strong the Church is in spite of all this separation and differences. I argue that it is because of the sacramental understanding that has been retained/ lived into throughout the life of the Church Militant upon the Earth.
Pax et Bonum

Nervous energy

Well I’m off to teach a class on the Ritual movement in the American Church. I’m a little nervous…I’ve never been responsible for the content of a class before. Today is the feast of Alcuin, a fitting saint for my début. St. Alcuin pray for me a sinner:


From the LFF:
Almighty God, who in a rude and barbarous age didst raise up thy deacon Alcuin to rekindle the light of learning: Illumine our minds, we pray thee, that amid the uncertainties and confusions of our own time we may show forth thine eternal truth….

Back in the saddle again

Well I’m back after a five day absence from the blogging world. This is a post for Ethics, but it runs a little closer to home.


After reading Fr. Adam’s book, What is Postmodern Biblical Criticism I realized where most of my trouble with this whole postmodern things sprang. I never had an academic/critical mindset with which to approach biblical/church interpretation before. Mine was faith based. The Bible and the Church for me were not texts and institutions to be deconstructed or toyed with. They were the wellspring of my faith…all charitable acts on my part and for that matter, my relationship with God, came from the Church and the scripture. So my problems with all this ‘interpretation’ was that it turned what had given me such strength into a piece of meat, to be chopped up by the butcher of academia. Same thing went for the mass or celebration of the Holy Eucharist- it became less about the presence of Christ on the Altar and in the hearts of the faithful…and more about correct language and pleasing the community…things are viewed with less fear and trembling around here. It means nothing for some to rip the sacred scripture apart and deem it useless…the same goes for the Church. While I’m not blind to the state of mankind and its history, I always assumed that Christians were abusing the Church and scripture when they did stuff to hurt people…maybe it was just me? As of late of grown very tired and have been worn thin by all of this. The language I use to pray is one of poor theology…my views of the Holy Eucharist and the Church are archaic and superstitious…and the place scripture holds in my very being is narrow minded and damaging etc. etc. etc.


While I understand the importance of study, I question how this critical analysis helps to build ministries and deepen faith Christ.


So I’ll carry on trying day by day to remain firm in my faith amidst my woes of studying things that I am still afraid to approach for fear they are to holy…..


For those who might worry, I’m not about to self-destruct…just writing what’s on my mind after an Ethics class. This really all came about when a dear friend of mine from the Sudan said that “God put presidents in power and God removes them from their thrones.” For him God is the Sovereign ruler of all, and not in some distant sense, rather up close and personal- day by day hour by hour. That was the faith I came here with…the faith I regained in C.P.E.- and the same faith that has been deconstructed through my academic endeavors.


I fear we claim more authority than we ought…I fear we decide for ourselves what is righteous in God’s eye…I fear we replace the will of God for the will of humanity. I fear that we often walk to proudly upon the earth.

Wednesday Night Ramblings

Wow…It has been a long strange trip to this point in the quarter…I’m still scrambling, trying to thread ideas together for my paper for independent study. I’ve got some ideas, but nothing blog worthy as of yet (unless you can read Jeff gibberish- the official programming language of A View from the Sacristy). I’ve mostly got everything in order and things are looking a bit up. So hopefully I return to blogging in full force. But first I have to go to Fla. to visit the in-laws. It will be a much needed break…one of my best friends here, and a doctor, has been telling me to rest, so doc I am going to rest. Can you rest with a fly rod in your hand? That’s what I’m most excited about. Fishing for these:

Which means I get to spent some time tying these tonight:

Another much needed contemplation break.
I need to mention ethics, so here is my embedded ethics blog:
We’ve been reading the truth is stranger than it used to be and Fowl’s Interpreting Scripture. This has been a very frustrating time for me…at least the first part was. Now they have turned to fight Post Modernism and my mood changed. But I still remain a bit weary. All they have done is embrace what the Church has done for its existence, but have changed the words to hide the baggage. Church now equals community. Totalizing has become a friendly Metanarrative and Church councils have been changed to dialogue and conversation. They have done a decent job at veiling the ancient and putting a fresher face on it, but all and all it is the same animal. After all, though there have been a few times people have been held at gunpoint and made to believe…but for the most part people have willing engaged the community known as the Church. If one strays too far from accepted interpretation, one fails to remain inside the community…all the while communities/ the Church is guided by conversation and dialogue i.e. when they must live within the world and minister to it. But that’s enough for now. Happy Trev Daddy?.


I thought I would leave you with two poems. The first by the Greatful Dead and the second by Fredrick Schiller. The first reappeared in my thoughts today after a long break. My friend Kerb and I use to imagine what ole Jerry was up to as we fished ( if you have ideas post them…enlighten Kerb and me). The second I learned of through The Brothers K. and it stuck with me.


Boots were of leather, a breath of cologne
the mirror was a window she sat by alone.
All around the garden grew scarlet and purple
and crimson and blue.
She came dead and she went, and at last went away,
the garden was sealed when the flowers decayed.
On the wall of the garden a legend did say,
no one may come here since no one may
stay.


THE GLOVE
by: Friedrich Schiller (1759-1805)
EFORE his lion-court
Impatient for the sport,
King Francis sat one day;
The peers of his realm sat around,
And in balcony high from the ground
Sat the ladies in beauteous array.
And when with his finger he beckoned,
The gate opened wide in a second
And in, with deliberate tread,
Enters a lion dread,
And looks around
Yet utters no sound;
Then long he yawns
And shakes his mane,
And, stretching each limb,
Down lies he again.

Again signs the king,--
The next gate open flies,
And, lo! with a wild spring,
A tiger out hies.
When the lion he sees, loudly roars he about,
And a terrible circle his tail traces out.
Protruding his tongue, past the lion he walks,
And, snarling with rage, round him warily stalks
Then, growling anew,
On one side lies down too.

Again signs the king,--
And two gates open fly,
And, lo! with one spring,
Two leopards out hie.
On the tiger they rush, for the fight nothing loth,
But he with his paws seizes hold of them both
And the lion, with roaring, gets up, - then all's still,
The fierce beasts stalk around, madly thirsting to kill.

From the balcony raised high above
A fair hand lets fall down a glove
Into the lists, where 'tis seen
The lion and tiger between.

To the knight, Sir Delorges, in tone of jest,
Then speaks young Cunigund fair;
"Sir Knight, if the love that thou feel'st in thy breast
Is as warm as thou'rt wont at each moment to swear,
Pick up, I pray thee, the glove that lies there!"

And the knight, in a moment, with dauntless tread,
Jumps into the lists, nor seeks to linger,
And, from out the midst of those monsters dread,
Picks up the glove with a daring finger.

And the knights and ladies of high degree
With wonder and horror the action see,
While he quietly brings in his hand the glove,
The praise of his courage each mouth employs;
Meanwhile, with a tender look of love,
The promise to him of coming joys,
Fair Cunigund welcomes him back to his place.
But he threw the glove point-blank in her face:
"Lady, no thanks from thee I'll receive!"
And that selfsame hour he took his leave.

The New Angelic Choir.

With the end of the quarter and the Commencement Ceremony here at Seabury coming up, I've been backsliding on my posting…I’ll try and do better I promise. There has been a lot going on here in the sacristy as of late. I had a great weekend. I spent Friday evening in the company of a lot of my blogging community, so I’ll spare the intricate details…but Trish is an outstanding actor and watching her and her cast perform was an excellent break from the daily grind (see Tripp and Susie’s blogs for more on the big event. Today was a good day. I went to mass and there was an extra treat. The Hubbard High School choir was with us and partaking in the mass settings. Great works as Ave Verum Corpus Mozart’s setting, Adoramus Te setting by Rosselli, Laudate Dominum, setting by Mozart and a few others. But boy could those kids sing! What was even more amazing and somewhat touching for me was there personal style. Underneath their mandatory Maroon Blazers, blue ties and kaki’s, was radical style. Some had multiple pearcings, which normally isn’t noteworthy, but nose and eyebrow rings still seem a bit out of place to this southern boy. The choir had several shades of unnatural hair color, vibrant and radical in the setting of a Gothic Nave. What was even more amazing was the heart that was pouring out of those people. You know the kind of music that wells your eyes up with tears and warms your heart. These kids had the Spirit and it showed.


Cat and my evening was spent with the youth group…always a good time, but only two kids showed up, which is actually more difficult than having a bunch of kids. But it was nice to spend some time with them in the presence of the LORD.


O yeh. I forgot about this morning’s confirmation class. I set my mind on ‘higher things’ when arranging my discussion on the Holy Spirit. I began with the narrative of Mary’s conception by the Holy Ghost. Something I take for granted…but a subject that is of great interest for teenagers. I fumbled through an onslaught of questions about God the Holy Ghost having sex (?!) with Mary. Although I tried to explain to them that we can’t talk about it in those physical sort of terms, they were much more interested in the scandal of physical acts. Be ye warned! If you teach kids about the conception of Jesus, be prepared to handle the wrath brought on by adult naiveté. A side note. A year ago I did learn this: never make the mistake of mentioning the age of Mary at conception around Fr. Knight and family. I still got burn marks from the evil eye of the Knight parents. Live and learn I guess. But the good news is I did survive the ordeal and I think the kids began to get the jest of things. Their closing prayers actually evoked the Spirit for guidance and protection and aid in learning…a new and wonderful twist in our common prayer life.


Today is the feast of St. Monnica (which shall be moved of course) and I had a little trouble finding an image of her...but I did find a cool altar at St. Monica's Parish.
Well I need to get back to pressing matters….
Grace and Peace